daddy gula manis....

according to my purse, im going to be broke until end of June. OMG! help~

My on-hold list since im broke till June:

1. 1 Tera HDD
2. Diana F+ lomo camera (owh soo sedih!)
3. new BB (I dont need it that much i guess)
4. A new laptop (still got dad's soo far)

I guess that pretty much of all i want but i can't afford it. soo sweet sugar daddy needed pls?

Piper betle leaf....

mom told me to eat piper betle leaf. she said, if you want to get married now you should eat it. I read wikipedia about this leaves, yea it has loads of nutrions and somehow a cure to.. ok ill paste the a snip of the wiki info.

"In Malaysia they are used to treat headaches, arthritis and joint pain. In the Philippines, Thailand, Indonesia and China they are used to relieve toothache. In the Philippines, they are used specifically as a stimulant and was believed to strengthen the teeth and gums. In Indonesia they are drunk as an infusion and used as an antibiotic. They are also used in an infusion to cure indigestion, as a topical cure for constipation, as a decongestant and as an aid to lactation. Almost all Indonesian women use sirih leaves in bath water after giving birth as it shrinks the vaginal canal. It also counters unpleasant smells.[citation needed] The Indonesian government has endorsed betel leaves (daun sirih) as a natural medication against vaginal discharge." -wikipedia-

I wonder, in what sense that a leaf could help me with finding a guy to get married with. Mom asked me to Selawat ke atas nabi s.a.w, and then wish for what i want in a guy and chew it and swallow it. So?? I can still do it without the leaf right? I mean, praying and Doa and tawakkal are the most important structure in everyday life to ask for God's help.(please correct this if im wronged). but still, the leaf with kapur and gambir. dont ask me about the taste. it is just a pure bomb in your mouth. it taste like spicy,bitter and somewhat minty. chewing it is like chewing crunchy leaf with all tastes exploding in my mouth. when the swallowing part came, i felt like i am swallowing a stack of paper plus the earlier bombing taste. it is ridiculously yucky! I wonder how can my late grandma, grand aunts and grand uncles ate it everyday. anyway, i think ill just pray harder, keep on doa-ing and tawakkal. taqdir, i believe in it.

my next mission!

this is diana +

but I want this..

Diana F+

but I'm in love. truly in love with this.

Mr Pink Diana F+

p/s: dad getting better today. :D

p/s p/s: picture credit to google[dot]com

I love you more each day..

hmmm... dad threw up at a shopping mall just now. It really freaked me out. I am not good with emergency situation like this, so I was a bit lost at that time. I guided him to the nearest dustbin then i walked away. oh god, i cant lay my eyes on vomit or people vomiting because i will simply join them. so I stayed away. when he finally finish with vomiting, i hurriedly walked to the car, leaving him standing there alone to catch up some air. after i picked him up, I drove like a mad cow with hope that he wouldn't throw up in the car. I wasn't that alarmed with dad's condition at that time because he keep on insisting that its the cappuccino that is acting weird in his body. But when mom start calling my siblings asking them to come over, everything started to knock my sense. All bad memories flashes before my eyes. My sister panicked. She told me the last time he was warded, he was vomiting non stop a day before. I didn't remember that, i only remember that my brother and I sent him to ER while my sisters went to my niece recital. it was the longest week i have to endured.

Somehow i'm thankful that i'm not married yet. i cant imagine what would happen to him if i ever got married.

he slept through the evening. I woke him up around 7.20 to remind him to pray. I keep on nagging him to visit the doctor. Now i know where i got my hard headed genetic. haih!. like father like daughter. so when my sister came, he complained to her saying that i talked too much and i bothered his sleep.. ahhaaha.. ooopsy daisy.. but I'm thankful again that he is in good condition. He became sickless (ok i made this word up) when siblings came over to visit. Hopefully, tomorrow he will do just dandy fine. :)

when HE reminds us that our time will come soon..

how would you feel when last week you were crying for no reason, keep on texting your friends asking whether they are ok or not, praying that Allah will guard them in everyday life and today you found out that someone's best friend passed away few minutes after talking to him/them. Its been like this since before she died. I'm thankful that so far none except she dear to me passed away. Should i be thankful?

dear friends, If i ever hurt your feeling, I'm truly sorry.

If i ever use your money and never return it back, please remind me or my family.

If i ever received any help from you, thank you so much.

If you have grudge on me, please forgive me or at least let me know, i hope to sort it out.

And i am truly thankful that I have you as my friend or some one i know.

owh crap!

owh crap!

im out of its league...eh ker it is out of my league... whateverlahkn tapi I makan hati... ahahahahaa...

after 5 minutes : ok tak jadi crap... tapi haih! tarik tali sensorang..

after 15 minutes : ok jadik blk owh crap... double haih! mahu knock my head dengan laptop ini..

i need new muse..

The title should comes with a warn "Don't read this if you are in love.."

watching vday is a bit turned off.. no make it a lot... I really wants a bff like Reed Bennett(Ashton Kutcher) and the relationship ends there. You get what i mean right. I just hope(really hoping) that my bff stays bff and my boyfriend is my Husband. But since my some sort of "kawan Baik" is no longer available and got really busy over i dont know what and couldn't consider anything about me, I guess I should now find another BFF to simply fill the hole. ok Im a bit emotional over this but yeah, Im tired of keeping it in. Tapi tak mahu terus terang. wtf kn?. So anyway I want Reed Bennett to be my BFF but of course without those hideos pink cap, pink shirt and PINK jacket. Pink is not for men you know. ok thats my wish for now.

Quoted from Dialah aka Babe, "semua orang dalam cerita itu adelah fcuked up ok".. ahaaha.. I should not watched the movie with Babe considering her current life "situation". To make it better, i should not watch the movie at all. Owh well my intention watching that movie is because of the actors. Yeah, i like Aston, McDreamy(Dempsey) and McSteamy(Dane), not soo much on Bradley, highly high on Topher Grace(nerdy but cool) and Elizondo(more likely to be a father to me). On the 14th, i lost appreciation towards love. affection to the other gender. nada. hilang gone. So when i watched that movie, i feel like we will make mistakes until we found the one and we will still make mistakes after we got married by cheating or commit adultery. So to me, i hate making mistakes eventhough every step i took is a mistake. So why making mistakes of loving if we knew that love is a mistake. ok ok, I'm the love killer, the cupid hater but its just me on this day at this time. I may change my perception towards love probably the next minute or the next hour or the next day. well who can predict the future kn?

Ps: it is soo disturbing.. I watched vday and i think love is fool.. love is non-existance.. but when i watched Greys, i felt something slowly creeping in making my heart warmer. owh soo disturbing..

another ps: this is the day when Dialah eh Babe got herself a crush. That person likes Babe and he works at kedai coklat.. So cute ok watching Babe stammered and getting pinkier by minute when a friend of that person ask her number. Owh so chomel! pls dont hate me babe!

telepathy.....

saya suka awaklah muffin man...










p/s:saya memerlukan kekuatan untuk meluahkan perasaan.

The Present

he sent my resume to the client. now i have to wait and see. Will i get the approval or will i get an interview? cuak cuak.. doesnt seems right. Am I really a senior developer now?? mcm tak percaya. I dont think my knowledge and experience is at par with the title. Talked with Sue, we were sort of in denial state that we are actually a senior developer. Tak nak ngaku.. owh great..

What is PLSQL? what is Cognos? hwa hwa hwa hwa.. help...

On other hand, will i able to leave everything?Am I too selfish to leave everything, just for the sake of this? I prayed, I prayed so hard and yet my heart says just go. But my mind refuse to work around it. Macam macam nk fikir. help again!

are you willing to relocate to....

Hyderabad?? ahahahaa...
what a question..
mahu tak mahu? ekekkekeke..
tepuk dada tanya hati..