there is nothing that can challenge my mind for the past 2 working days. well, some of the student already went for a holiday which mean less people in the shop and itll make me hang myself..ooo not that tragic my life is. anyway, usually i will accompanied by the students' attitude towards me. since the schools over for them, which mean school is over for me also. their perangai are soo making headache grew stronger in my head. here are the list of attitude that i have learnt:
some of them are very cheerful and talkative even when they have flu.. They make my day a lot easier..
some of them are very conservative which mean they only say: 'brape nie kak?'..they, -my friend- is a good customer because they dont really burden you when you have 5-10 customer line up.
some of them really took their time to take out money from their purse. Once, there is a customer and a long queue and she my friend took her sweet own time to open her bag, take out the purse, grab the money and passed it to me. During her long voyage of paying, i have already received 3 people's money.. goosh, i kinda 50% hate/50% love them..
some people really really got on my nerve!!!.. some of them throw the stuff on the table like they own the world. hey dude n dudets, ure only undergrad bukan laei grad..goshh..n more, treat people especially the one under your supervision the same with the one with same level... If you are doing this, you are not going to have a better future.. thrust me..
Monday, May 28, 2007
Friday, May 25, 2007
L.O.V.E
I love them...
my ayah: i watched pirates, it was a great story. they have slip in dad's moment in the movie, suitable for father's day. One trying to save the dad, one lost the dad and the other one reunited with the dad. what i feel the most is losing the dad moment. until now, i keep figuring out how to handle those emotion. I am a muslim, i have to believe in qada' n qadar but somehow i cant. Maybe i can, i just didnt know how. tears almost at the tip of my eyes, but being me, i suck it in. dont ask me how, its my nature. Everyday im scared more than the day before. when i went out, i will feel guilty for not spending the day with my precious one. when i am back, i would cry because i have lost a day with him. will i ever get enough memory to get me through a day...?even i couldnt finish the sentence. im crying, silly o' me...
my ma': I would trade my life for her. but im not a perfect daughter..fighting with her hurt me but somehow it becomes often than seldom. I need her in my life but i need a day off.. Shes all i have next to my dad. Shes all i need, when i longed for a company...which is soo often..
My siblings: nothing more i can say about them..we grow up together, we fought, we laugh, we cry..My pray is for them and my parents..
My friends: first day without them, i already miss them. Their laugh make my tears stop. their concerns make my heart fill with hope..their memories make me lived through the day.. we came from different place but somehow we connected through something just like ayun wrote.. we hit off like we've known each other before.. Lets pray to Allah that we will be 'as one'.. we started with one house and we live on with S1..
my ayah: i watched pirates, it was a great story. they have slip in dad's moment in the movie, suitable for father's day. One trying to save the dad, one lost the dad and the other one reunited with the dad. what i feel the most is losing the dad moment. until now, i keep figuring out how to handle those emotion. I am a muslim, i have to believe in qada' n qadar but somehow i cant. Maybe i can, i just didnt know how. tears almost at the tip of my eyes, but being me, i suck it in. dont ask me how, its my nature. Everyday im scared more than the day before. when i went out, i will feel guilty for not spending the day with my precious one. when i am back, i would cry because i have lost a day with him. will i ever get enough memory to get me through a day...?even i couldnt finish the sentence. im crying, silly o' me...
my ma': I would trade my life for her. but im not a perfect daughter..fighting with her hurt me but somehow it becomes often than seldom. I need her in my life but i need a day off.. Shes all i have next to my dad. Shes all i need, when i longed for a company...which is soo often..
My siblings: nothing more i can say about them..we grow up together, we fought, we laugh, we cry..My pray is for them and my parents..
My friends: first day without them, i already miss them. Their laugh make my tears stop. their concerns make my heart fill with hope..their memories make me lived through the day.. we came from different place but somehow we connected through something just like ayun wrote.. we hit off like we've known each other before.. Lets pray to Allah that we will be 'as one'.. we started with one house and we live on with S1..
Thursday, May 17, 2007
a smile
today i am going to talk about a smile.. since the first day of working, i cant stop smiling. It reverted me to my past long-gone self and also petrosains.. during my early-youth(which i am now a little bit mature youth) i was a i-cant-stop-smiling-to-people except when im with someone whom i adore, liked, admire(mostly men) and hate. I never thought of people's true feeling about me. Maybe i do, but i dont give a damn at that moment. When i was given opportunity to be a volunteer, man.. i really really cant stop smiling. I remember when my first/second year of study, I volunteered with the big P to teach others about science. It is to educate young/ old ones about certain facts in science that we could apply to our daily lives and also it is to test how minds work. At that time, i was a smile-er.. when i talk to people i would smile... eventhough i dont like the person, i would smile.. but there is a small hint of hatred in the smile.. what?? i am not born to be perfect lady ok... the big P's big people always remind us to smile, to be gracious to people, to treat customer with respect and project some P dignity in us. Maybe i was tired being a smile-er and i stop for a while to smile, i mean really honest smile. i always potrayed a smile which is not connected to my feelings and heart. But when i was uncontrollable of my smile, i would sneak in the word 'h' in the smile..
SOmehow, over the years of waiting and practicing, i managed to smile again.. its all because of the student and lecturer in ptpl and kutpm. they have reminded me of good ol' days.. and there are rules there.. be good to people so that we wont get a stab in the back, but if we are unlucky its too bad. people will always pirate your ideas but stay focus to be far more better than them. customer will have some sorts of attitude that will make u vomit, but smile coz we need their money..ehehe the last one was my rules.. *winkies*
soo.. smile everyone, itll make u look good and itll make others feel good... and if u work with customer, itll make ur pockets look extra goooooooooood~~
SOmehow, over the years of waiting and practicing, i managed to smile again.. its all because of the student and lecturer in ptpl and kutpm. they have reminded me of good ol' days.. and there are rules there.. be good to people so that we wont get a stab in the back, but if we are unlucky its too bad. people will always pirate your ideas but stay focus to be far more better than them. customer will have some sorts of attitude that will make u vomit, but smile coz we need their money..ehehe the last one was my rules.. *winkies*
soo.. smile everyone, itll make u look good and itll make others feel good... and if u work with customer, itll make ur pockets look extra goooooooooood~~
Thursday, May 10, 2007
no more tears....
early this month, i went to hospital with my dad for his check-up. Alhamdulillah everything went ok. but somehow that couldnt ease my heart. everyday i would sleep with a pray for my parent to wake up next morning. mostly i would pray for my dad. last year, he was admitted to hospital because of minor heart attack. He managed to pulled himself together and undergo a minor surgery. its something about stapling the vein to make the blood run smoothly(i cant even remember whats the name of the surgery). I felt such an urge to go back, but i couldnt define this tangling feeling that has been around me.thank god i went back. a weekend at home turned out to be a week in hospital. he was admitted on saturday with me helping him with the admission. i stayed with him every night except for 2 days. I was tired at that moment. i dont know what i felt at that time. I managed to take online test, laughing at my bro's jokes, eat, sleep, bathe in the hospital. he got himself released from hospital on friday. it was in the month of Ramadhan. Being in the same hospital on Ramadhan brings back bad memories. my grandparent died in the same hospital in month of syawal. i have lived in hospital since i was 6 years old.
my tok bak died because of stroke. he died soo sudden that i couldnt even say goodbye and ask for his forgiveness. my dad got a minor stroke when i was in form 4. he stayed in hospital for two days only. he had the guts and also strength to be able to walk without cain in less than a year. I am really proud of him.
My tok mak died 3 years later. it happen when i was in std 3. its in the same hospital with different level and different room. my dad knows that she is going to leave us that night. he told me a story about my tok mak on the night of her death. She said ' Leh, Leh, ade dua org dekat atas nie kacau mak laaa' Leh is my dad's name. My dad replied ' Mak, mak hafal x surah yaasin? kalau mak x hafal, salleh bace nanti mak ikut ye.' and she died after the families gone back home. 7 years later, my dad was admitted to hospital. same hospital but not in ramadhan. but after 6 years later in ramadhan month he was admitted.
During last year Ramadhan, something happen and it really creeps me out. I was praying and suddenly i got a vision, a sad vision that this is the last ramadhan we are together. the vision haunt me down until today. everyday i would wake up thinking whether is this the last day? I am afraid that i will lose him before i say my goodbye. As a muslim i know its qada' and qadar, but i couldnt see myself departed from my dad.
I am afraid to find job because i know my dad need me. he needs someone to follow him everywhere. I couldnt ask my lil brother because he is in his phase of life where 'all i need is my friend'. my olderst bro is busy with his family, so is my sister. Dont ask about my other brother. I just dont want to talk about him.
what should i do? i have lost a 'BF' because of my father. I am soo thinking about my father that i forgot to think about her. but she never get this side of me because i always act like im ok. i am not ok.
this post is just for me to poured out what is inside my heart. this is the bravest action i have ever made this year. I couldnt talk to anyone because i would cry and i would think that no one understands me. i am such a dick to think of my friends like that. but thats just me.
my tok bak died because of stroke. he died soo sudden that i couldnt even say goodbye and ask for his forgiveness. my dad got a minor stroke when i was in form 4. he stayed in hospital for two days only. he had the guts and also strength to be able to walk without cain in less than a year. I am really proud of him.
My tok mak died 3 years later. it happen when i was in std 3. its in the same hospital with different level and different room. my dad knows that she is going to leave us that night. he told me a story about my tok mak on the night of her death. She said ' Leh, Leh, ade dua org dekat atas nie kacau mak laaa' Leh is my dad's name. My dad replied ' Mak, mak hafal x surah yaasin? kalau mak x hafal, salleh bace nanti mak ikut ye.' and she died after the families gone back home. 7 years later, my dad was admitted to hospital. same hospital but not in ramadhan. but after 6 years later in ramadhan month he was admitted.
During last year Ramadhan, something happen and it really creeps me out. I was praying and suddenly i got a vision, a sad vision that this is the last ramadhan we are together. the vision haunt me down until today. everyday i would wake up thinking whether is this the last day? I am afraid that i will lose him before i say my goodbye. As a muslim i know its qada' and qadar, but i couldnt see myself departed from my dad.
I am afraid to find job because i know my dad need me. he needs someone to follow him everywhere. I couldnt ask my lil brother because he is in his phase of life where 'all i need is my friend'. my olderst bro is busy with his family, so is my sister. Dont ask about my other brother. I just dont want to talk about him.
what should i do? i have lost a 'BF' because of my father. I am soo thinking about my father that i forgot to think about her. but she never get this side of me because i always act like im ok. i am not ok.
this post is just for me to poured out what is inside my heart. this is the bravest action i have ever made this year. I couldnt talk to anyone because i would cry and i would think that no one understands me. i am such a dick to think of my friends like that. but thats just me.
Wednesday, May 9, 2007
another day as a muffin seller...
for the past few days i have been bored while selling muffin so i did a few survey on my own.. I found out that:
- 2 out of 3 men who want to buy ciggies have RM5 note. seriously, if you're short of RM 5, just wait for any man to buy ciggies. 14 ciggies = atleast rm 4.30.. RM4.30 = a plate of rice with chickies.. haihhh!!
- 1 out of 3 men who buys ciggies is darn good looking.. thank god im single!!! and anyway, their face do brighten my hour...
- everyone called me kak and once called me aunt.. heyy am i that old??
- 2 out of 3 men who buy ciggies will also buy some mints... thats a quick thinker dude!! nobody like smelly breath
- a good looking man dont buy junk food. he only buy drinks..
- 1 out of 3 men will come everyday to buy ciggies...
- nips will sold out in 2 days... nips is soo hot in ptpl
- coke, 100 plus and soy bean is soo in...
- breads will sold out by 1 pm... but not my muffin.. whats wrong with my muffins?
- i will end up buying junk foods from there at the end of the day... so much of saving my money for future.. ehehhe
bad weather...
call me stupid..
i downloaded antm cycle 8 episode 8 through bittorrent for days!! 3 days ok!!! with approximately 5 hours per day and it turned out.... i have already watched that episode... dang dang dang!!!! tensennyerrrr.... now i have to wait for another eps to be downloaded... which it will take like 3 days again!!! with muffins and sales girl, i dont have time to online... now it makes me wanna errmm shopping... eheheehe, some people shopping is the best theraphy.. hi hi
i downloaded antm cycle 8 episode 8 through bittorrent for days!! 3 days ok!!! with approximately 5 hours per day and it turned out.... i have already watched that episode... dang dang dang!!!! tensennyerrrr.... now i have to wait for another eps to be downloaded... which it will take like 3 days again!!! with muffins and sales girl, i dont have time to online... now it makes me wanna errmm shopping... eheheehe, some people shopping is the best theraphy.. hi hi
Friday, May 4, 2007
greetings evione...
again... i have moved out from the last place to the new one... new blog for new adventure.. well, its been 6 months since my last paper and i havent receive any good news.. but this wont stop me from enjoying my life as an aunt.. haa haaa.. pity mt niece.. but shes leaving soon with her parents to jln ampang.. this would mean i wont see her until raya or family reunion...
sooo what have i done for the last 6 months? i went for a job hunting for like a week then i decided to pursue my study. until now i am still waiting for result of my apps.. im sooo sure that im not goin to be acceptd. maybe i shuld enroll in s.h.i.t.. har har har..
after a while, i got my first job!! which is becoming a driver and a personnel assistant.. sending my lil bro to work, accompanying my dad to hospie and assisting him in everyday chores, send my mum for her workout, send my niece to her school and help my sis with her job.. too much of work but im being paid RM50 from my bro, lunches from my dad, thanks from my mum, a kiss from my lil niece and a kfc from my sis.. i wonder how i can survive rm50 in a month? that would mean no top up(only when emergency), catch a ride with someone for a movie, no snacks during movie(except when im with the lil bro.. he is basically my fav man right now.ehehe.), NO SHOPPING!! and uhh NO SHOPPING!! for 6 months and i only bought a toppyshoppy shirt... thank god my mom went for a hols(leaving me with my dad, and i dont have a clue how to cook asian lunch n dinner.i only cook italian food only..have a pity for my future husband which will be like hundreds more days...hahaha. thanks to my sis, she cooks every meal.. ehehhe) and she bought 3 shirts and one of them for my niece.. sooo thats all i have in six months.. did i tell you that my handphone hmmm went kaput?huwa huwa, it happend exactly on my sis wedding day.. and until now, i havent got it fixed. im freakin out of ringgits right now.
now i have a real job!! sort of laa kn... i am now officially a muffin baker.. :D.. i sold 11 muffins in 2 days!!! that is a real achievement for a muffin seller.ehehehe... now i am thinking of supplying it to my sis workplace and trying to find another place to supply the muffin.. hopefully by the end of the month i will have enough money to go SHOPPING and also watching moviess.. soo anyone, wanna buy my muffins?? ehehhe...
sooo what have i done for the last 6 months? i went for a job hunting for like a week then i decided to pursue my study. until now i am still waiting for result of my apps.. im sooo sure that im not goin to be acceptd. maybe i shuld enroll in s.h.i.t.. har har har..
after a while, i got my first job!! which is becoming a driver and a personnel assistant.. sending my lil bro to work, accompanying my dad to hospie and assisting him in everyday chores, send my mum for her workout, send my niece to her school and help my sis with her job.. too much of work but im being paid RM50 from my bro, lunches from my dad, thanks from my mum, a kiss from my lil niece and a kfc from my sis.. i wonder how i can survive rm50 in a month? that would mean no top up(only when emergency), catch a ride with someone for a movie, no snacks during movie(except when im with the lil bro.. he is basically my fav man right now.ehehe.), NO SHOPPING!! and uhh NO SHOPPING!! for 6 months and i only bought a toppyshoppy shirt... thank god my mom went for a hols(leaving me with my dad, and i dont have a clue how to cook asian lunch n dinner.i only cook italian food only..have a pity for my future husband which will be like hundreds more days...hahaha. thanks to my sis, she cooks every meal.. ehehhe) and she bought 3 shirts and one of them for my niece.. sooo thats all i have in six months.. did i tell you that my handphone hmmm went kaput?huwa huwa, it happend exactly on my sis wedding day.. and until now, i havent got it fixed. im freakin out of ringgits right now.
now i have a real job!! sort of laa kn... i am now officially a muffin baker.. :D.. i sold 11 muffins in 2 days!!! that is a real achievement for a muffin seller.ehehehe... now i am thinking of supplying it to my sis workplace and trying to find another place to supply the muffin.. hopefully by the end of the month i will have enough money to go SHOPPING and also watching moviess.. soo anyone, wanna buy my muffins?? ehehhe...
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